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News for Norther Colorado and the world

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Posts Tagged ‘humor’

Slices of Life, Small talk

Slices of Life, Small talk

Small talk not always so small   By: Jill Pertler     I am a small talker. My son christened me with the label yesterday. “Have you ever noticed you make chit chat with everyone you meet?” he asked. His words felt more like an accusation than a question. “You’re a small talker,” he said. I knew he was right. I also knew my blithe banter possesses a power and purpose unknown to non-small talkers. I believe we are in the middle of a ... Full Story

A really short history of broccoli

  Rev. James L. Snyder Have you ever had serious second thoughts about something? Of course, I usually have severe trouble with establishing first thoughts. But once I have finished a serious thought I like put it behind me and go on with life. For example. For years, people have been telling me how harmful drinking coffee is. Something to do, so they tell me, with being addicted to caffeine. Then, if I cannot give up coffee, I am to limit the number of cups of coffee I drink per ... Full Story

Slices of Life, Doggone good advice from the Cat

Slices of Life, Doggone good advice from the Cat

By: Jill Pertler Meow. It’s me again, the Cat. You may remember my discourse from a previous occasion. Today I’ve brought my vast cat intelligence to fill your ordinary day with a dose of feline insight. Lucky you. I’ll let you in on a little secret: I have the universe at my whiskertips and I’m not afraid to say so. Cats rule the world. Oh sure, humans pay the rent, but we control the house – and all the contents therein. Including the dog. Take my dog (and I mean that in ... Full Story

Slices of Life, A message to my favorite child

Slices of Life, A message to my favorite child

    By: Jill Pertler   Every mother has a favorite – or so the saying goes. Before becoming a mother myself, I wondered if this were true. A mother’s love is complete and unconditional, but not perfect. How can a mother love all her children equally? The answer is simple: she can’t. I am here today to come clean with each of my children. Ahem. Pause. Here goes. My dearest first-born child: I have something important to tell you. You suffered ... Full Story

Dealing with my recent drug problem

Rev. James L. Snyder It all began for me about four months ago. I was busy with my work when the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage came and interrupted me. Really, I do not mind interruptions. An interruption, from anybody, is a wonderful excuse to stop what you are doing and take a break. The older I get the more breaks I seem to need. "I think we ought to take a vacation," she said. Well, when my wife comes up with a good idea she comes up with a good idea! I did not know if we ... Full Story

Slices of Life: A love story

Slices of Life: A love story

Bickering: a love story   By: Jill Pertler We were busy bickering – like couples can bicker after two or 12 or 20 years of marriage. He made breakfast five mornings in a row. I folded eight loads of laundry. He fed the dog and took out the garbage. I fed the fish and cleaned the toilets. I made meatloaf. He shoveled the driveway. I helped with homework. He served as field trip chaperone. I packed bagged lunches. He drove the kids to school. Finally, it was Friday and we ... Full Story

Slices of Life

Slices of Life

Counting your friends   By Jill Pertler   I lost a friend yesterday. It wasn’t due to accident, injury, death or any other natural causes. I suffered a digital loss. Not of the finger or toe variety, but of the computer kind. Facebook-related. Yesterday, I visited the social networking site and noted I had 151 friends. Today, when I ventured back to my page, the number had dipped to 150. There could be only one explanation. I’d been unfriended. Usually, ... Full Story

Slices of Life

Slices of Life

The great toothbrush takeover   By Jill Pertler   Something is awry around here. I believe my household slipped through a wormhole and the rules of the cosmic universe are no longer in effect. In other words, my life is spinning out of control and reality’s gone right along with it. Something’s fishy with the toothbrushes. My family possesses six sets of teeth (not counting the dog); therefore logic would dictate a total of six toothbrushes should reside in my ... Full Story

Slices of Life, by Jill Pertler

Slices of Life, by Jill Pertler

A woman who tells you where to go By: Jill Pertler My husband has a new lady friend. He shares her with our three sons, who are also sweet on the most recent family acquaintance. They are, in a word, enamored. Under normal circumstances, I might feel threatened – what with my four guys throwing their rapt attention toward another woman’s voice – but these aren’t normal circumstances. That’s because the woman in question, we call her “Carmen,” isn’t a ... Full Story

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